The Difference Between a Healthy and an Unhealthy Relationship


Being in a relationship is an integral part of one’s life.

These personal and sometimes impersonal ties are not the same from the other. Often times the most personal and intimate relationships have the most impact in our lives. What may start out as a sweet beginning could sometimes turn either for the worst or for the best as the relationship further develops.

However, one has to admit that sometimes being in a relationship might not be good for you. In fact, there are some relationships that are not just healthy to be in. Here is a difference between what it is like being in healthy relationship versus an unhealthy one.

1.) Real Giving VS. Giving to Get

Contrary to popular belief, when it comes to relationships, it’s not a give and take situation.Being in healthy relationship does not necessarily require you to expect anything in return. As the concept of true love dictates that when a person does love you, they will show it and give it to you in many ways.  An unhealthy relationship requires you to expect something in return which is not the case as every individual has different ways of showing or “giving” love. A healthy relationship will indicate that both of you are willing to give.

2.) Accepting VS. Wanting to Change the Partner

Loving someone means that you accept them wholeheartedly for who they are. From their most desirable traits to their shortcomings, loving someone means you love them as the whole package. There are no buts and ifs. When you find yourself changing your partner or if you find that your partner has the intention of changing you, it’s time to bolt.

Changing someone indicates that you are there merely to fit into specific wants and needs.

3.) Genuine Desire VS. Pushing Your Partner


A healthy relationship does not use guilt to get what one desires from the other. In fact, a healthy relationship encourages you to genuinely give what your partner needs. An unhealthy relationship pushes you to guilt which indicates that they demand something from that you should immediately give. Let’s face it, this is sometimes not the case.

4.) Exposure VS. Protecting Privacy

One of the best indications that you are in a healthy relationship is that both of your weaknesses and other private information are shared exclusively between the two of you. This is not the case for an unhealthy relationship that involves exposing a partner’s weakness or fault to the world as if it is some kind of winning lottery number.

5.) Revenge VS. Restoration

Arguments are a normal part of a relationship. And one of the best indications that you are in a healthy relationship is that after every argument is a way for you to  intimately get to know your partner. Every argument that comes your way is an opportunity to mature both as individual people and as partners in the relationship.

An unhealthy relationship does otherwise. The arguments will serve as a form of revenge or a way to get back at your partner for their wrongdoings.



6.) Self-centeredness vs. Shared Dreams

The purpose of forming a true relationship is when two individuals form one real union. One concrete example for this is when these two people plan dreams together. It means that both of their actions are geared towards developing a more permanent life together. An unhealthy relationship would require one partner to give up on their dreams.

An unhealthy relationship can cause you more harm than good. One should not drastically suffer by being in a relationship that can cause not just physical but also emotional and psychological trouble for you. Remember that being in love and involved with a person may not be a walk in the park but it should not reach to the extent where one becomes a victim to one’s own partner.

Here are other indications of what its means to be in a toxic relationship.


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