Every time people talk about their talents, we usually just shut our mouths up, agreeing to everything they say and praising them, not saying anything about ourself. When the spotlight gets to us, we cringe like we are just about to answer a hard trigonometry problem. We think we don’t have anything to show and boast, but truth is, everyone has. Just that, not everyone are confident enough to let the world know.
Everyone hides something interesting and worth sharing inside. It’s either we believe we’re not good enough at it or it’s not something that is worth the praise, that’s why we tend to hide it in the corner of our brain. But that attitude wouldn’t work in life. This world is one big arena where people compete to be at the top of the game. Life is short, and resources are scarce. If you don’t fight, you lose, and every day will feel like you’re at the edge of a cliff.
We don’t want that to happen to you, so here are six habits that are proven to be practiced by confident people, say authors Jen Sincero (You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life) and Katty Kay and Claire Shipman (The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance—What Women Should Know). It’s time to do these for your own sake.
1. Learn from Your Failures
Instead of seeing your failures as a reason to give up, learn from them and take them as your key to improvement. Of course, it is easier said than done (everything is). But it is not too hard to do it. Take failures as an information-gathering course. Let experience be your teacher. There’s no telling how far you will go, if you start doing this now.
2. Be Responsible
This sounds a bit clichéd, but it is more helpful than you think. We often put the blame to others when we have done something wrong. To boost your confidence, it is advisable to take full responsibility of your decisions and all of your actions. If you wait for others to clean up your mess, you will be dependent and cannot stand by yourself.
3. Go Out of Your Comfort Zone
We tend to stick to the things that are easy for us and forget about the rest. If we’re caught in the middle of a situation where we’re asked to do something we haven’t done before, we back out, but that’s not really recommended. According to authors Kay and Shipman, nothing builds confidence like taking action, especially when the action involves risk and failure. A confident person is a risk-taker. Accept challenges and learn from them and eventually be a master at them.
4. Watch Your Language
Words can be powerful than you think. Telling yourself about bad things is not really healthy. As Sincero puts it, confident people don’t speak badly about themselves; they question their self-doubts instead. You have to learn to shoo negative thoughts away. Heard about negativity making you look older? That’s actually quite true.
5. Sit Confidently
Confidence is not only rooted out from the inside. Your physical position can influence your confidence level too. According to Kay and Shipman, learning to sit up straight can give you short-term confidence. Keep your abs in and your chin up. And they suggest to practice nodding your head when talking. It helps.
6. Seek Out Inspiration and Advice
You’re not alone in this. There can be many people out there who were once a curl-up baby and never stood up for themselves. Learn to read books, take up classes, or ask help from mentors and coaches. Do not be afraid to admit your weaknesses and have someone to share it with.
Learning these six habits is not enough, if there’s no determination. The number one rule still is to believe in yourself. If you don’t have faith in your capability, none of these will work. This world can be cruel. You need to have what it takes to stand out and make yourself that someone you’ve always wanted to be. Let the shy moments be gone.